Monday, February 27, 2012

As if the stress from the release of the A level results are not enough,I have to face the stress of work as well.
First thing in the morning and I get slammed with a "Hey, the work you did last week had lots of errors". And there I was looking like an idiot. I thought I did a decent job, I thought I could handle it, I thought that it was quite simple. But no, I screwed it up. And this bastard wasn't making things easier by saying things like "oh but never mind I cleared up the mess for you" or "next time I re-teach the process to you again".

Here is the thing.

I FEEL STUPID.

and I hate that feeling.
I just hate it when people think I am incompetent, lousy or just stupid. Yes, I make mistakes, but that doesn't mean I cannot learn from it and improve. Some people are just too unforgiving. They leave a task to someone, if sub-standard work is returned, they label you as lousy and will remember you screwed it up for eternity. I admit I am guilty for having the tendency to label some people like that. But because I hate this feeling and make an effort to change myself. I am not a genius, but I can also safely say I am not dumb. So please just freaking give me a second chance to try again. Don't you bloody throw a "Never mind I will just do it myself" crap in my face. This is why I never like taking up responsibilities. Expectations come. And if you don't meet up to the expectations, you disappoint people. And to those who are nice to say, "Hey, it's okay. You're not dumb, it was just unfortunate that you had a bad day", well, thank you for being so understanding. But the truth is, I screwed up. No matter how nicely you put it, I still screwed up. I have only myself to blame.

With A's results round the corner, I have absolutely no mood to do work. Guess the office people will just have to tolerate this.

rambled on 2/27/2012 10:56:00 am

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